How has been 2018 so far?

300 days of this year have passed, 65 more to go. Wow, It’s festive season – Diwali, Thanks Giving, Christmas all the festivals are around. So today, let’s have a walk back on the journey of the memory lane of this year to know –“How this year was, what majors are yet to be accomplished, How far have you reached with the resolutions of this year, what will be the plans of the coming year. “. Let’s have a look at mine first then you take some time to think about yours.

This Year, I have got the subscription to Amazon Prime, Netflix, hotstar premium, so we have killed much time on movies and web series. I have signed up for various food applications – Uber eats, Zomato, Swiggy and three more, thus had a good time with food, In fact, My friends have nicknamed me “Swiggy”. This year, I have become the victim of PUBG and weight gain. I have travelled more and refrained myself from using social media apps. I was planning to start meditation and yoga, be fit and in shape but end up eating more brownies and have donated my enough salary to food applications.

Life hit me hard with some lessons and sudden unexpected changes this year. So, I got distracted very soon from my career, health and learning goals. The mental stress of mine has pushed me to move in a different direction and that direction was the direction looking for peace and comfort. My comfort zone resulted in a delay of the accomplishment of my targets. It took a long time to buckle up and realise that the year is on the verge of its end and I am still in the middle of some targets.

“Disappointment and remorse over anything will now not result into any good outcome“. So, I am going to mention the positive side for all the people who are disheartened like me over unfulfilled targets of this year I might have behaved like a spoiled brat but “I discovered how to appreciate myself, how to dance like no one is watching, how to relish this very moment, how to shut down the past and dead windows of yesterday, how to cut off from negative and fake people, how to prioritize yourself. I have got a good control over my weakness of losing temper. I have scrutinized myself to be a better individual for me“.

In a nutshell, Considering all the virtues and vices, this year I might have not grown into economic terms, health, shape or in education but I have learnt the most important chapters of life, I am on the track of peace, happiness and my dreams that will have a profound effect on my future. Most important thing is 300 days might have passed, but there are 65 more, It’s the time not to waste these precious days and come up with quality moments with the sense of relief of fulfilled aspirations, Don’t go for any packed deadlines but at least start with few of them because “SOMETHING IS ALWAYS BETTER THAN NOTHING”. As in, you may not achieve a fit body in 65 days but a few pounds will also come up with a joy. A spoon full of success can motivate you to achieve a bowl full of success. 

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15

Are You Compatible in your Relationship?

The scariest word for me in this world is “Relationship“, Say the word “Relationship” a couple of times and I will run away but one fine day while getting hair massage from my grandmother, I questioned her, What’s her story –“What kept them adhere to this bond for more than 50+ years?” It is your late 70’s, Do you ever felt in your lifetime about quitting or giving up on each other? Do you guys struggle on stupid random things like our generation? I am sure every one of us has some such questions back and forth in our life?

Guess what, she replied to me, She said these are all aspects of life, everyone encounter this but you are the one who decides what to choose, It’s all about priorities. Not all relationships are perfect but some are, the one which u don’t fit in should be left at the right time. The one where you find reasons to stay, try cementing them up for long haul, nurture them up, they just require to make up a few compatibilities, “Love doesn’t beg for sacrifices“, as the world says, instead love supports you to grow and makes you stronger, love holds your back and say “Hey! Listen, I am there for you“. Well, there are no adequate factors which define relationship compatibility but few factors which strong relationship demands besides love are –

    • Emotional Compatibility – The relationship can endure if you have trust, understanding between you two halves, the vibes and recognising the need, care of each other’s requirements is vital, how emotionally you are open to your partner in good or bad which can include conversations about each other on small chores of life or big chaos of life. It’s good to have gossiping, bitching, daydreaming and life planning sessions between you two. It’s the joy of being compatible with each other for celebrating small blossoming flower to overcoming dark clouds together.
    • Interests– The idea of how do we want to shape our life and relationship is very important, two individual may not share the same life vision but they need to match their relationship goals that what they as in look for their relationship and their life goals also decide some small and big factors because still in this crucial world love can not earn bread for you . Sharing some hobbies and interests are a great help, this is what I learn from one of my friend’s couple they share the same food and travel interest so they spend half of their life doing it.
    • Respect – Respect to your partner should always be maintained even at the time of frustration, in public or private. I have seen some people posting happy romantic pictures on facebook and then fighting like monkeys offline, maintain respect in public as well as private.
    • Physical Compatibility – It may sound lame or even contrasts the definition of love, For the large part of society “Looks” are also one of the important components it’s just that everyone has the different definition of looks. You need to be excited about your partner, and certainly not be repulsed. The physical compatibility is clearly based on a subjective set of preferences of an individual. Not having the same style can have a negative long-term effect on your relationship.

Writer’s Tip – Don’t let the teenager love die within you, those random roses, chocolates, morning kisses, cooking surprise meals and random trips do wonders till the date.

12

Life – A Trip!!

“Life is a race, if you don’t run fast you’ll get trampled” – said by Everyone.

Today, I want to change the fact of life being a race. According to me, Life is not a race but a trip, where you travel from one destination to another. You don’t have to run fast, you have to live where you are. Have you ever been on a trip? How do we plan for a trip – we decide the place we are touring, the people we want to travel with, the scenes we want to explore. That’s how Life’s wherein we shape our dreams, fantasies, our profession and the companion, buddies with whom we want to blow our life.

Now what’s the next in the trip, we start travelling to a wonderful journey singing, dancing, whirling and playing on the tour with some sleepy riders, the same we do in our life where we breathe the moments with our family, friends and sleepy ghosts who have no much role in our life but are part of it.

You reach your first destination, get excited to explore it, click some solo pictures some group pictures, this is how life looks- you finish your first destination, enjoy some moments alone, together and then you move to another place, other destination. We recall our last destination, design memories, cherish them. This is how we move in life from school, college, work, family, kids, retirement and lot of other moments. We experience some hard moments, some good moments as in trip some spots are artistic, some are not. You can experience some bad hotel room or bad food, as we encounter some moment of discomfort in life, there can be hardships, some places would be plain, some would be overwhelming and some will be disheartening. Every trip is a wonderful story like life.

Sometimes roads will be smooth, some will be ruptured, sometime you will travel in moonlight under the sky full of stars, sometime in a peaceful breeze and sometime under hot sun, fiery air, there would be a garden of flowers, there would be deserts , there would be mountains and furious oceans, there would be a calm beach and beautiful sunrise.

Now it’s a time to think Do you want to run in some unknown race with no end point just changing laps or you want to be a tourist in some never-ending trip with lots of adventures. Life is how we perceive it. It’s the time to pack your bags, hold the steering of life, raise the music up, grab some beer and dance like no one’ watching. It’s the time to take your hands out of the window, fasten your heartbeat and move your fingers in the air.

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9

REGRETS – A teacher who lets you learn and grow…!!

“I keep dwelling back and forth on the chances I took, the bus I boarded and the paths I didn’t get a chance to take.” – Nisha Lamichaney 

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In the world of 7.6 billion people there is no human being who can say that they don’t have any regrets. Regret is the outcome of some undesirable conditions/situation happened or happening because of our actions in the past and those actions are called mistakes. In short, when expectations don’t meet reality, we witness the emotion what we all know as disappointment and which cumulates into regret.

However, though it’s not only the mistake which makes us regret things, it’s sometimes the choices in life which have to take, knowingly and unknowingly which in long run doesn’t satisfy our minds, doesn’t make us feel happy from inside that trigger this emotion time and again. We ponder at the thought “if and why”, get stuck on the moment and keep deliberating back and forth by feeling trapped inside an empty vessel.

From a kid on the bed to an aged person on deathbed, everyone is having regrets. We regret only when we or something in which we were involved gets fail. Having regrets can cause health issues like depression, anxiety, lack of interest, sadness etc.

We all know the fact that human is made of mistakes and as the famous quote by ‘Alexander Pope’ says, “To err is human”. The number of regrets is directly proportional to the age of the person and that makes us more experienced. This is why, as we grow, so are our experiences.

There could be any reason for your regret like wrong choices, wrong career, failed relationships or failure in any task for which we were preparing for some time. Regret would be more if there is any loss involved which can’t be reversed or regained.

So are you regretting on something? Are you dwelling back and forth on your past? If yes, then you got to increase your rational thought process.

  1. Acceptance:

First of all, you need to understand that you can’t go into the past and fix your issues. Whatever has happened has already happened. Not everything you want is meant to happen and you can’t control everything.  Keep telling yourself that the best is yet to come and this was just a lesson which you can implement for a better future.

  1. Don’t blame:

Don’t blame yourself for the things which happened against your choice. At the same time doesn’t blame other people as well. It’s you who let them the way they acted. Take accountability of yourself because nobody can control you other than yourself.

Don’t panic, YOU DID WHAT YOU FELT RIGHT. You were happy, weren’t you? Now the situation is not in your hand doesn’t mean you were wrong. It just means that it has run out of its course in your life and that chapter is closed.  Remind yourself that at some point of time it’s you who were doing or took those decisions and which obviously made you happy.

We learn from our mistakes and implement those lessons in our future. Failure makes us the better version of ourselves.

  1. Analyze, learn and apply:

By analyzing I didn’t mean that you need to think of what could have done and what shouldn’t have done so that it didn’t come out this way. Know the reason of regret and apply whatever you learned in the past. Just analyze that what you did wrong and make sure not to repeat the same mistake again in future.

Keep in mind, if you dwell on what you got as an outcome then you won’t get back on track. But if you look for the lessons learned from the past mistakes then you feel positive.

  1. Move ahead:

In the end, all you need to do is just let it be whatever happened. And move ahead by setting goals even if they are the same in which you made mistake or you failed. You would realize that you can do better this time as you are experienced and aware of the mistakes.

Forgive yourself, write a letter to yourself and turn your regret into gratitude by being positive towards future rather than recalling past. Practice self-affirmation that will help you gain self-confidence. Make the routine for exercise as it cheers up your mood. Hit the gym, do meditation or just simply go out for a walk.

After sometime when things fall into your favour and then someday you will smile on your past mistakes and feel that…. it always happens for a reason.

Conclusion:

Through a process of continuous healing & transformation, we all become more aware of our own self. Regrets open doors to new opportunities in life. Had we not faced regret earlier, we would not have suffered, had we not suffered, we would not be wise enough to make the best of every situation which is under our control…so hold regret but not keep for long….you never know when life gives you an opportunity to redeem it.

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– Vivek Uniyal

2

“Alive” or “Just Breathing”?

What is the meaning of “Alive”??? According to the dictionary, the answer is – having life, living, existing, not dead or lifeless, in a state of action, in force or operation, active.
According to me, this is not what alive actually means! The question is still not answered properly, So my friends, I ask this question to you – Are you alive? I believe, most of you will come up with an answer – Yes, I am alive.
But when I asked this question, Have you thought what is your definition of Alive?

According to me If you wake up in the morning and sleep at night, and have zero time to scrutinise yourself, to follow your passion, to travel across the world, to love someone, to just sit and analyse the actual dilemmas of your life and much more, then my friend “YOU ARE NOT ALIVE“. The drums of your veins and heart are good to prove you as a living thing but not your existence. Take a deep breath, and think – Are you surviving or living? Are you one more HUMAN ROBOT?

Do you remember the last trip plan you made and it failed? Do you remember you planned for the gym/yoga class? Do you remember you wanted to join the music/dance class? You wanted to learn that new technology, you had a dream of changing this job, your idea of proposing to your crush. All your ideas that failed made you dead bit by bit. You might be following the same dead monotonous routine from weeks, months or years. Why don’t you wake up?
Now, my dear fella, I have one more question for you – WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL ALIVE?
Last week I questioned this with many people surrounding me and got the interesting responses, I have shortlisted some interesting responses- The strings of my Guitar makes me feel alive, PUBG(Game) and hot tea make me feel alive,I feel alive when I see those beautiful, flowing rivers, chirping birds and snowfall. That cool breeze makes me feel alive. The moment I finish my hill trek makes me feel alive, I feel alive when my program runs in one go without any error.

I evaluated all the answers and concluded – What makes us alive are – the purpose of being a better person than who we are, the hope of attaining good, the love of following our passion, thrive to fulfil our dreams, the zeal in our heart. So just take a pause, break the glass ceiling you created for yourself and GO LIVE! Issue yourself a life ticket and “BE ALIVE”. Stop striving for peace and prioritise your passion. Explore YOURSELF.

Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you! –Dr. Seus

Just feel the below lines from the movie – Zindagi Na Milegi Dubara
Dilon mein tum apni betabiyan leke chal rahe ho
Toh zinda ho tum!
Nazar mein khwaabon ki bijliyan leke chal rahe ho
Toh zinda ho tum!

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12

Kerala – Killed By Rains or Humans?

Land of backwaters, coconut fringed beaches, rejuvenating Ayurvedic massages and colourful festivals; Yes! You guessed it right. I am talking about the God’s own country, Kerala, one of the most picturesque places in India – This is what I have always read about Kerala in Travel Blogs, but suddenly The God own place headlines changed to – “Death toll reaches 370 in flood and landslides“. The condition is very melancholic and grief struck, everyone is sad and subdued but we have missed very important question – “What is the reason behind so much rains?“. It’s the second week of September, still it’s raining cats and dogs across the country.

Is this disaster Man Made ??

I think yes, the disaster was totally man made. A 2014 Indian Institute of Tropical Meteorology study based on rainfall data since 1900 said that intensity of the monsoon rains was increasing and one of the factors for it was global warming. Another 2017 IIT Bombay study held deforestation as primary reason. Deep Inside, we all are aware it’s a result of our Karma(deeds) that we have done to nature but we are ignoring the fact. It’s high time to realise the change in environmental conditions –

Many Scientists have pointed out that there was a massive deforestation in the region to make railways and to turn Kerala into enchanting tourist spot, Moreover, the floods were the reason to human incursions and unscientific developmental activities in ecologically-sensitive areas.

Soil erosion was more prevalent in the Western Ghats. Mountain sides of Kerala were facing severe soil erosion problem. “In Panathura, Veli and Anjuthengu (all the coastal areas of Thiruvananthapuram) rivers, the sand mining was extensive for human resource development. When the flood hit the river shores there was no good sand to absorb water and incessant rain. Swollen rivers did what they naturally do. Flood took over the plains, took down whatever humans constructed along the path, and drained into backwaters, submerging the areas they naturally inundate, and we call it a disaster.

The construction of Mullaperiyar Dam was another set of human interventions into the mountain ecosystem, hydroelectric power generation systems, starting with project at Pallivasal. Since then, 33 hydro power projects came up which directly challenged the ecological balance of the mountain system, and even the physical stability,as most of the reservoirs were built in the lineaments of the Western Ghats’ geologic structures.

With loss of so much human life, people’s house, their dreams and a beautiful state, there were many innocent animals died in these floods who were not even at fault. According to state government. there was a loss of Rs 20,000 crore and 10,000 kms roads washed away in flood which will take years to recover.

I am not planning to write the prevention steps because as the educated class of nation, we all are already aware about it. I just want to raise the point it’s high time to stand up for our nation, raise our voice against the harm we are doing to nature. Every individual can make a change to society.

NASA releases images of before and after Kerala flood –

kerala-nasa-1535442503

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In The End, It’s All About?

I don’t want to start this blog with the outcome of any process either Success or Failure. I want to start it with the outset of the journey that we traverse to achieve anything in our life. It can be any simpler process which can include driving from home to office, appearing in a semester, looking for a job, working on a project, friendship, relationship or your music classes.

When you get into any process of life, do you always plan for the result – that this friendship will last 10 years, I will score highest marks this semester, I will just get passing marks this time or I will just learn to sing 5 songs etc. The truth is not every time we plan for the result, sometimes we even change our plans in the middle and sometimes we even give up in the middle. e.g. Drop School or College, Leave job, Skip gym, Leave music classes in between and much more.

In the journey of every milestone, we make a lot of memories, spend a lot of moments of happiness, laughter, joy, tears, sorrows etc. We learn a lot of stuff, we develop new ideas, work on them. Sometimes we learn how to work in a team or an individual, we learn about our weaknesses and our strengths. We learn about our priorities and choice. We learn habits and technical stuff.

Success – Success is rejoicing. It comes with a lot of happiness, opportunities, good luck and blessings. After getting success, we simply move to other parts of life and we even forget it in a few days. It gives you more comfort, if you have failed before and that too goes away with the glimpse of time. The moment of happiness is short lived.

Failure – Failure comes with grief and disappointment, but why Failure gives you disappointment? All this while with a lot of good things, just because it ends resulting in failure we forgot all those leanings. We forget experience always comes with something new, something different, something you never felt and Something you never lived. But that’s life my friends, “Nothing is constant except change“. The truth is -” One can say sorry but can’t change the story“.

Failure gives you the learning to the road of success. One should learn the ideas from failure’s that how to invade success next time. Use it as a key of strength to unlock your potential you have within. Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny, our greatest success is not in never failing but in rising up every time we fail because Some skills are only learnt in storms. Moreover, we do the same thing in our day to day life but we forget these things at bigger steps of our life.

There are the number of successful peoples who have failed more than once – Thomas Edison(Invented the bulb in 1000 attempts), Colonel Sanders(Founder of KFC who failed 1009 times).

“Failure is an option here. If things are not failing, you are not innovating enough” – Elon Musk

So In the end, It’s not about Success or failure. It’s all about the lessons we learnt from each experience, from countless moments that are going to last with you for whole life. In the end, Life goes on, life doesn’t stop, time doesn’t stop, learning never go waste and hard work never fails. You will achieve your success tomorrow or the day next.

#Success #Failure #Life #journey #Happiness #FindingYourself

20

The Joy of Being Average/Mediocre

ummm… Being average, If someone called you “average,” you probably wouldn’t take it as a compliment. Throughout my life everyone including my friends, teachers and family has asked me “To be the flamingo in a flock of pigeons” but why I have to be flamingo, why not a pigeon. Maybe I just want to be a pigeon. What’s wrong in being average?

Honestly, the first question which hits my mind from term “AVERAGE” is – what is the definition of average? I think,
Average = (Lower limit+ Upper limit)/2

What is Average?

This definition was very clear in school and college where scoring 50 % was average taking 0 as lower limit and 100 as the upper limit.
But in life what’s the lower limit and what’s the upper limit. Suppose I earn 30000 in a month, now who will define that it’s a mediocre salary or outstanding salary. For somebody who is begging on the traffic light -it’s more than an outstanding salary, for Bill gates it’s equivalent to a single penny. Yes, I can read your mind my reader – “It’s a mediocre salary for common people like us” but who said you are a common person, what is the definition of common??

I think being average is the most misunderstood term in our society. I am 5 feet 5 inches, this is average height in India, but in Australia average height is 5’9″, so basically If I visit there I will be below average in height.

Let’s move to sports “Ishant Sharma” bowler in Indian Cricket Team will definitely be considered as the above average because he had defeated a lot of people in the population of millions to reach that position but If we compare him to all the bowlers of their Nations cricket team, then he might be the average bowler.

Accepting The Fact –

More than 80% of the population think they are more than average, Although according to research 80-85% of humans are born as average. It’s a harsh reality of life.
This isn’t a good or bad thing because there is a vast array of qualities that can be measured. Everyone you meet will know something you don’t. Everyone’s skill levels will vary. Everyone’s personality will vary. We all are average in some aspects and we should start accepting the fact.

we are all unique, just like everyone else is. Enjoy your uniqueness and “just be yourself”. Trust me, there are a number of perks of being average –

1. No one expects much from you – Suppose I am 3 rated employee in my office, so my manager will never expect outstanding work from me.

2.No Performance Pressure – The expectations we have from Virat as captain of Indian Cricket Team and from Ashwin as a player of the team are totally different. So the performance pressure on Virat is much higher than on Ashwin.

3. Easily Appreciated – When I was in school, my parents expected 60% from me but luckily I secured 80%, When I told this to my father he asked me to check my name again in the result, to which I responded – “I did, and your name is mentioned in father’s name . That’s was the day my father gifted new mobile to me.

Many more…

Yes, It’s good to be mediocre. There is nothing wrong in being a pigeon, it’s all about the perspective. “No Jealousy, No Competitions, I have to win from myself, I have to lose from myself. I have my own journey, my own destination. WHO I AM? – An Average Person”. Break free from that box! Feel the Joy

average - hello

40

Finding Yourself!!

Of late, everyone is seeking the meaning of true happiness. In the fast-paced life of today, we have definitely reached the success of era, but the question that has always travelled in my mind from school to college to job is “What is True Happiness?”.Was it scoring good grades in school? Having fun in college? Working and earning hard in the job? or a lazy life. Four months back, whenever I used to look back at my life, I always found nothing, nothing means nothing much except some good scores. Once, I read an article saying ”When we die, we see a visual clip of seven minutes as a summary of our whole life” which raises a consciousness in me, “What would I see in the visual clip?” Honestly, it was very boring. We have just become machines, bookworms or work worms. I don’t support becoming lazy, skipping work, piling up the things. I believe in living for yourself, live for what you like, love what you do.

I wanted to be a writer but I did B.Tech. 4 years of hardship with 77% for my parent’s sake, I was crying for a job matching my profile. Despite scoring high grades, I struggled for 4 months and then got placed in a not-so-good place for my talent exposure. From day one, I was sure I did not want to do this job. But since I had no other option, I kept pushing myself into it with the daily struggle of 8 AM to 5 PM. Nine hours of my life daily were not worth spending there. The work sometimes frustrated me, I tried locking up myself in the washroom and crying, but the falling tears weren’t of any help either.

Sometimes, I even imagined my future as a “manager in seven years” but still there was no smile on my face.  Although I was working hard, getting appreciation, I always questioned myself, why I am doing this to myself, why do I not search for another job or do writing, but we humans are too lazy to stand up for ourselves. We keep ourselves in hot water for this monotonous life.  The time keeps on moving and we float with the waves of time.

One day, I woke up with a severe headache. I tried to push myself up from the bed, but I fell. The fever had gripped my body completely. My roommates took me to the hospital. Next day, I woke up with a glucose drip in my hand with cold droplets moving in my blood. My parents were sitting beside me, with lots of medicines. I was suffering from dengue. Seven days and with a minus 5 kg of my weight on the hospital bed, I realised life is mortal, and I was still not ready with that visual clip of life. Those seven days in the hospital gave me some worst memories of people dying which made me, even more, determined to live and come out stronger and live life on my own terms. Those seven days in hospital followed by ten days of bed rest gave me the time to reconstruct my life with bricks of happiness.

To refresh myself, I gave myself a break and travelled to Udaipur. I left for Udaipur on Friday after office and reached there by Saturday morning. Udaipur, the City of Lakes, was a complete bliss with small lakes, serenity, small mountains, and most importantly, lots of peace. Travelling always cheers me up and removes all the negative vibes. That day I realised life is mesmerising. The rain in Udaipur fastened my heartbeat, the eternal peace, chirping birds, deep water, scenic beauty was all that I was searching for my whole life. I visited all the places and left the city on Sunday night. Monday morning, I was back in the office with positive vibes.

I started studying after office, it took fifteen days and I found a new job matching my profile. Yes, it was not so easy, but I put my heart into it. Lots of learning and countless sleepless nights later, I finally found myself with a job offer. And, fifteen days later I was in my new office. And, finally, I was doing work that I was always looking for. The technology that I had learnt in my four years of graduation was finally being put to use.

I keep my passion alive and do what I always wanted to do, that is, write after office hours. Yes, I am not a well-known writer because it is just the beginning, the beginning of my era. I have enjoyed many more trips after that – one to Nainital, Mukhteshwar, Ranikhet and another to Manali and Rohtang Pass. I am happy with what I am doing.

With time I have realised that true happiness is finding yourself. I spend nine and half hours in the office, two hours in writing and weekends are for me, for all the fun. I save 30% of my salary for the future, 20% for travelling and 50% in monthly expenses. I am still not ready for my 7 min visual clip, but yes I will be ready soon. I am not sure if there is something like this visual clip, but I am sure if I am going to live a long life then post twenty years, when I will turn back to look at the past, I will be smiling and saying that there is a lot more to go.

One should not run from themselves because life is like a Barf ka gola. It is nothing but a crushed ice ball soaked in a sweet syrup with a variety of colours and flavours with lemon and salt sprinkled all over it. You have to enjoy every flavour. Crush your sorrows, enjoy the sugar syrups of your life, taste the salt and lemon in your life and search for your inspiration.

-Tushita Raghuvanshi

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