“I keep dwelling back and forth on the chances I took, the bus I boarded and the paths I didn’t get a chance to take.” – Nisha Lamichaney
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In the world of 7.6 billion people there is no human being who can say that they don’t have any regrets. Regret is the outcome of some undesirable conditions/situation happened or happening because of our actions in the past and those actions are called mistakes. In short, when expectations don’t meet reality, we witness the emotion what we all know as disappointment and which cumulates into regret.
However, though it’s not only the mistake which makes us regret things, it’s sometimes the choices in life which have to take, knowingly and unknowingly which in long run doesn’t satisfy our minds, doesn’t make us feel happy from inside that trigger this emotion time and again. We ponder at the thought “if and why”, get stuck on the moment and keep deliberating back and forth by feeling trapped inside an empty vessel.
From a kid on the bed to an aged person on deathbed, everyone is having regrets. We regret only when we or something in which we were involved gets fail. Having regrets can cause health issues like depression, anxiety, lack of interest, sadness etc.
We all know the fact that human is made of mistakes and as the famous quote by ‘Alexander Pope’ says, “To err is human”. The number of regrets is directly proportional to the age of the person and that makes us more experienced. This is why, as we grow, so are our experiences.
There could be any reason for your regret like wrong choices, wrong career, failed relationships or failure in any task for which we were preparing for some time. Regret would be more if there is any loss involved which can’t be reversed or regained.
So are you regretting on something? Are you dwelling back and forth on your past? If yes, then you got to increase your rational thought process.
- Acceptance:
First of all, you need to understand that you can’t go into the past and fix your issues. Whatever has happened has already happened. Not everything you want is meant to happen and you can’t control everything. Keep telling yourself that the best is yet to come and this was just a lesson which you can implement for a better future.
- Don’t blame:
Don’t blame yourself for the things which happened against your choice. At the same time doesn’t blame other people as well. It’s you who let them the way they acted. Take accountability of yourself because nobody can control you other than yourself.
Don’t panic, YOU DID WHAT YOU FELT RIGHT. You were happy, weren’t you? Now the situation is not in your hand doesn’t mean you were wrong. It just means that it has run out of its course in your life and that chapter is closed. Remind yourself that at some point of time it’s you who were doing or took those decisions and which obviously made you happy.
We learn from our mistakes and implement those lessons in our future. Failure makes us the better version of ourselves.
- Analyze, learn and apply:
By analyzing I didn’t mean that you need to think of what could have done and what shouldn’t have done so that it didn’t come out this way. Know the reason of regret and apply whatever you learned in the past. Just analyze that what you did wrong and make sure not to repeat the same mistake again in future.
Keep in mind, if you dwell on what you got as an outcome then you won’t get back on track. But if you look for the lessons learned from the past mistakes then you feel positive.
- Move ahead:
In the end, all you need to do is just let it be whatever happened. And move ahead by setting goals even if they are the same in which you made mistake or you failed. You would realize that you can do better this time as you are experienced and aware of the mistakes.
Forgive yourself, write a letter to yourself and turn your regret into gratitude by being positive towards future rather than recalling past. Practice self-affirmation that will help you gain self-confidence. Make the routine for exercise as it cheers up your mood. Hit the gym, do meditation or just simply go out for a walk.
After sometime when things fall into your favour and then someday you will smile on your past mistakes and feel that…. it always happens for a reason.
Conclusion:
Through a process of continuous healing & transformation, we all become more aware of our own self. Regrets open doors to new opportunities in life. Had we not faced regret earlier, we would not have suffered, had we not suffered, we would not be wise enough to make the best of every situation which is under our control…so hold regret but not keep for long….you never know when life gives you an opportunity to redeem it.
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– Vivek Uniyal
Nice work……
Thanks 🙂